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Author Topic: The world breakers  (Read 538 times)

fatmalky

The world breakers
« on: Sep 17, 2011, 09:34:58 PM »
i have written a short story on my tribe and intend to update it with the whole history of the tribe as it unfolds
 :lol:
The world breakers

Deep in the mountains of Mourn just west of the Sky Monolith there is a tribe called the world breakers.
The world breakers are ruled by a tyrant called green skaar, he is a hulking bruit whose strength is known far and wide.

When he was just a bull he was part of a small tribe called the bone grinders who were at war with a skavien clan that infested the mountain.
The tyrant of the clan had decided to take the skavien and all there riches for himself. He gathered his tribe and marched them to an entrance the hunters had located on the far side of the mountain.
The ground shook as the ogres of the bone grinders marched to war. The skavien clan master had known of the ogres marching to his kingdom and had set a trap.

As the bone grinders marched in to the mouth of the under empire the skavien lunched there warp lightning cannons at the walls of the mountain and brought the walls down on top of the ogre army.

The bone grinders were now halved in numbers and trapped with the skavien army pressing in on their position. The remaining ogres rushed forward into the oncoming skavien hordes.
As fat met fur there was a blood bath of corpses being trampled underfoot, the outnumbered ogres fought as furiously as they could but the greater numbers of their foe was just too much for them.
Hours after the fighting had started there was only a small pocket of ogres left amongst them skaar was swinging his massive club crushing tens of skavien at a time.
The rat men pressed on in to the ogre lines relentlessly, one of the rats that stood out from the rest was hooded and was wielding two blades that glowed with a bright green light.
The hooded skavien had lunched himself into the ogres and had started to slice them up with the greatest of ease.
Skaar swung his mighty weapon at the skavien just to watch the rat dodge the blow and to deliver three precision strikes to skaar's body and neck.
Skaar could feel the life slip from him as the glowing blades cut through his flesh.
Then there was darkness.

The darkness had filled skaar’s head and then there was nothing, from the distance a voice spoke “Free me”. The voice was old and powerful and its words echoed in skaar’s mind. There was lights getting brighter, skaar found himself on the ground of the cave amongst his fallen tribes ogres.
His body was badly wounded but has he struggled to his feet he could feel the wounds knit back together in to glowing green scares.

As he managed to shake some since back in to himself he realised that all of the ogres had fallen to the skavien and that they were now starting to celebrate their victory.
Skaar could feel a furious anger swell up from within him to the point he could no longer contain it. With an almighty roar he smashed his trunk like arms off the walls of the caves.
The force of the hit cracked the very rock of the mountain and the cave system collapsed in on its self.
The sound of the mountain collapsing could be heard for miles and when the dust had settled the entire skavien clan had perished in the cave in.

It took skaar two days to dig himself from the rubble of the cave and when he emerged his body covered in wounds started to heal into glowing green scares.
Skaar made his way back to the tribe settlement and told the story of what had happened to the butchers of the tribe. They interpreted the voice as the voice of the great god maw.
Skaar with this knowledge set off in to the mountains to the site of the great maw seeking answers

Reg06

Re: The world breakers
« Reply #1 on: Sep 18, 2011, 01:11:26 PM »
First thing first fatmalky- I really, really recommend breaking that up into more than three paragraphs. That solid block of text is intimidating, and the format is not fun to read.
If by RAW, you mean "Reg06's Audacious Whims", then you'd be right.
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fatmalky

Re: The world breakers
« Reply #2 on: Sep 18, 2011, 04:24:51 PM »
thanks for the comment ill do my best to split up the next part. iam not sure what you mean by format i dont post much on forums and never really understand what people are talking about.

fatmalky

Re: The world breakers
« Reply #3 on: Sep 18, 2011, 04:59:27 PM »
thanks for the help fantasyfreak i will do my best and i agree that it looks much better this way  :D

Fantasyfreak

Re: The world breakers
« Reply #4 on: Sep 18, 2011, 05:19:11 PM »
You're welcome  :)
You can't be old and wise, and have youthful memory... even if you are FF  :lol:

Achievements 39/101

Latest: 9. Sigh! - lose more than 3 ogres to any one casting of a spell that involved you taking an initiative test as part of it's resolution


W/L/D : 9/10/2

 

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